Potty training is one of those subjects known to spark debate. When is the best time to start potty training? That seems to be the ultimate question with no clear-cut answers. I was fortunate that I didn’t have any major issues with Tyler. I ignored the comments that boys are harder to train than girls or that I may have a harder time training him since I didn’t have the right equipment. But he made it through fine, going from Pampers to Pull-Ups to regular underwear relatively quick. We skipped right over the training pants phase all together.
Most parents start training somewhere between the ages of one and two, but what about starting potty training at two months? Yes, I said two months! If you were a parent in 1904, you may have started potty training at this young age. I ran across a short piece in the Summer 2006 issue of Wondertime (Then & Now:The Evolution of Potty Training) which compared expert opinions on the issue of potty training, comparing some of the philosophies of the past with present-day thinking.
Dr. L. Emmett Holt, author of The Care and Feeding of Children, wrote in 1904, that the best time to start training a child is at two months. Twice a day the child was placed on a small chamber, about the size of a pint bowl. According to the good doctor after about two weeks the child’s bowels would move on their own when placed on the pot.
Some forty years later in 1946, Dr. Benjamin Spock wrote in The Common Sense Book of Baby and Child Care, that in his opinion the best method is to leave the training up to the baby which generally happens in the later half of the second year.
And finally in 2003,The Baby Book, by Dr. William Sears and his wife Martha, a registered nurse, advised that “toilet training is a partnership between the parent and child“. They also caution that you can take a child to the bathroom but you can’t make them go and that ultimately our responsibility as parents is to help the child to achieve a “healthy toileting attitude.”
Isn’t it weird how such a natural body function is the cause of so much debate. I guess for parents one of the reasons is that we compare our kids to other kids their age and if little Suzy is potty trained at the age of two, then little Johnny should be potty trained not long thereafter. Other parents worry that their child will not be trained by the time they enter preschool or kindergarten even.
On this matter I have to side with Dr. Spock. I found that taking the attitude that Tyler would go when he was ready worked best for me. There was no pressure, no cajoling. When he went in the potty, I praised him and that was it. No charts, graphs, stickers or treats. I also found that using the actual toilet worked better than the potty once he figured out that this was what he was supposed to do. The thing to remember is that each child is different and no matter what the experts say, the child is ultimately the one in control.