At this point I am sure you are just looking for some relief in transitioning your child when they return home whether from a weekend stay or extended stay at the other parents’ house. Please keep in mind that not all transitions work for all families, and that it will depend a great deal on the child in question, the home life and the day of the week or time of the day that the child is returned home.
The definition of transition is: Passage from one form, state, style, or place to another. Many children from all types of backgrounds have problems with transitioning, and some you would never even notice. It is the children who have difficulty with changes that are usually affected the most in custody cases.
There are many different types of children out there, and how they react is as different as they are individually. For us, one of the things that we noticed is that each child handled returning home differently. One came home and couldn’t wait to be as close to us as she could. Another came home and withdrew, opting for time in her room away from everyone. The other was quiet, slightly withdrawn but more so from being so overly exhausted.
The hardest one to deal with is actually the child that withdrew herself. While she does enjoy alone time, it was awkward to have her disappear as soon as she returned home. So we changed as much as we could about her arrival home. Now, when they return home, we try to do something immediately.
The types of activities that you are able to do when they get home, is often dependent on the child, the time and the situation. We might try to run to the grocery store, go grab a bite to eat, we might run to someones house and visit, go out for ice cream or other special treat or we might just go out and run a few errands. We also try activities that don’t require us to leave home. We might have a movie ready that everyone wanted to see, do a fun craft project, take a walk together or ride bikes, make cookies or some other type of food, or any other activity that requires us to have fun and be together. This has made transitioning at our home a whole lot easier.
Please see Tips and Tricks for Easier Transitions When the Kids Return Home part 2 for the second half of this article. It will post tomorrow morning.