As a new mother, having a crying baby can be trying. Obviously, the first concern is the baby, making sure that he or she is comfortable, safe, healthy, and happy. However, a common mistake seen by most new mothers is forgetting about “self”. Being a new mother requires a tremendous amount of time and effort geared toward the baby but to be the best mother you can possibly be, you too need to feel comfortable, safe, healthy, and happy.
The first suggestion we offer for coping with a crying baby is to utilize help. If you have a mother, mother-in-law, grandmother, sister, cousin, or friend who has offered to give you a break, accept it. Typically, new mothers always feel nervous about leaving the baby with anyone. While this is perfectly normal, it does not benefit you as a mother. Remember, your mother, mother-in-law, grandmother, and so on, have raised children too so you need to trust.
Keep in mind that “leaving” your baby with someone could be as simple as taking a much-needed nap in another room. However, we recommend you go a step further and take an hour or two to do something for you. Getting away from a crying baby, especially one with colic is crucial to the way in which you handle being a mother. Take this time to go shopping, out to lunch with a friend, or a walk in the park. The first time you do this, chances are you will be miserable with your mind completely on the baby, which is normal but making this a routine once or twice a week will help you get into a better schedule, which is good for you and ultimately, your baby.
You might also find a support group for new mothers where childcare is provided onsite. With this, you and other mothers in your situation can spend time sharing stories, swapping information, laughing, and so on, knowing your baby is in good hands while again just a room away. Another suggestion is that while the baby naps, put on a favorite CD. In fact, take advantage of this time, lying down to rest while listening to Andreas Bocelli, Michael Bolton, Celine Dion, and so on.
One of the hardest methods for coping with a crying baby is to let him/her cry. If you have changed the diaper, fed the baby, provided some cuddle time, and everything is fine but your baby still cries, it will NOT hurt to let him or her cry. New parents think a baby should never cry but in truth, a little crying, as long as everything is okay, is not a bad a thing. For this, put your baby down where you know he/she is safe and then leave the room. Is this hard – absolutely but a crying baby does not have to be held all the time. In fact, some babies will learn very quickly to be manipulative, identifying that hard crying means being held.
Look, the bottom line is that having a newborn in the home is hard work, although completely gratifying. Probably the most challenging aspect of being a parent is dealing with the crying. I remember one time, actually sitting with my son in the rocking chair at 3:00 a.m. He was crying and I just started crying with him since I did not know what else to do. The funny thing was that as I sat there and cried my eyes out, I realized he had stopped and fallen asleep. I had to laugh, realizing that I had a beautiful, healthy baby, and that I had been so incredibly blessed. I remember my mother telling me to treasure each day, crying or not. She explained that time would go by so quickly. My son is now 24 and engaged – mom was right.