4. Do NOT attempt to hide financial assets.
With today’s technology and the utter lack of privacy perpetuated by ever expanding databases, you will get caught. The judge will not look kindly on such a strategy, and you will probably end up giving up more than the “hidden” assets are worth.
5. Do NOT be cheap.
Don’t try to get the cheapest attorney instead of the best. You will end up paying more in the long run. You might be tempted to try one of those do it yourself divorce kits, but it isn’t advised unless you are well versed in law. If your soon to be ex has an attorney, you may find yourself in big trouble. An attorney can stump most people in about ten seconds with a brilliant flourish of legalese, or some obscure argument. Once he or she knows you are filing on your own, the attorney will most likely file several motions. You will be pulling your hair out trying to respond to even one in most cases. If you fail to respond, it will hurt your case, so you will probably end up hiring an attorney anyway.
6. Do NOT ever enter into mediation without your attorney present.
Do not be bullied into accepting an agreement that makes you uncomfortable. Mediated settlements are binding. Do not agree to anything that you are not prepared to live with indefinitely.
7. Do NOT make the divorce harder on your kids.
Your children will be traumatized enough by the fact that their parents are splitting up, so don’t make it any worse for them. Don’t fight in front of them, and never make them choose sides. Never denigrate your ex to your children. Kids love both of their parents and you will hurt them more than you will ever hurt your ex. It can also come back to haunt you in the courtroom.