I think there are no other two words that a single parent needs to hear than “trust yourself”—we get advice and judgment coming at us from every direction. There are books, articles, talk shows, and well-meaning (and not-so-well-meaning) people who offer us all sorts of advice. For some reason, the fact that we are single parents seems to make people think that we must not know what we’re doing. Add to that the fact that our confidence may be shaken by some of the troubles and crisis we’ve endured and we may not be trusting ourselves either. The truth is, we have to learn how to trust ourselves because we are charged with holding our families together!
When you’ve made mistakes, or life has dished up some challenging realities, our self esteem and self trust can be the first thing to go. After all, if we made THAT choice or decision, whose to say we won’t make another questionable one? All we can see are the supposed wrong choices we’ve made and we may even question whether or not we are fit to be a parent if things have turned out the way they have. Stop. It is important to realize that we have control over our thoughts and a slight shift in thinking can help us turn the corner. We really do owe it to ourselves, and to our kids to learn how to trust that we know what is best for ourselves and for our families. Maybe things haven’t always ended up on the sunny side of the street, but who gets the sunny side of the street all the time anyway? We still need to trust that we can improve our lives and take care of ourselves and our kids. After all, no one knows our child or our own mind better than we do.
Instead of turning to a team of experts or handing over the future of our family to other people and institutions, it is so important for single parents to learn to trust themselves!
Also: Is Fear Holding You Back? How to Work With Your Fears