Do people describe yourself and your spouse as “two peas in a pod?” Do you usually know what the other person is thinking and can finish each other’s sentences? As I mentioned in my earlier post, good marriages can be made up of two people who are opposite and balance each other. They can also be made up of two people who are amazingly similar. Both types of marriages have their good and their not so good. Which marriage is yours?
The Two Peas
The two of you never seem to argue because you are usually of the same mind. While issues are up for discussion, they are usually solved before they begin because you both tend to want the same things and see the world the same way. Should you choose an elaborate vacation or take a week off to putter around the house? Will you host a big blow out party or have a small gathering of friends over for a dinner party? There is not much debate.
The Good
With spouses that are similar, there can be less tension in the relationship when it comes to life decisions. Since you have similar approaches to everything from child rearing to money, you can run well together as a well-oiled machine. You can tend to feel very close to your partner, because of that mutual understanding.
The Not So Good
With two peas, there isn’t much balance of personalities, so shortfalls can be doubled, leaving you both dazed when things don’t go your way or when you don’t know how to proceed. Also, there could be a tendency to forget that you are two separate people that don’t have to agree 100 percent of the time.
The Advice
If you and your partner are very similar, it is important to check in with each other on decisions, even if you think you know the results. Also, make sure to expose yourselves to new adventures and new ideas to stimulate the relationship and grow together as a couple.
During the moments of disagreement, don’t blow things out of proportion. Just because one issue is surprisingly difficult, doesn’t mean that the marriage is in trouble. Use that close similarity to understand each other and attack the challenge together.
Mary Ann Romans writes about everything related to saving money in the Frugal Blog, creating a home in the Home Blog, caring for little ones in the Baby Blog and now relationships in the Marriage Blog. You can read more of her articles by clicking here.
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