When my kids were younger it was easy to pay them a compliment. They soaked it up. You could see the gleam in their eye as their smile took up their whole face. It was like watching sunshine come through.
These days…well, whenever I try to give a compliment I get the raised eyebrow, a roll of the eyes or a shrug of the shoulders (which translated means “whatever”).
It’s just a phase…it’s just a phase…I keep telling myself.
But I won’t stop paying them compliments because I know that their outward behavior isn’t a true reflection of what is within. No matter how they may act, teens love to hear compliments. They love to hear “I love you.” They love to hear you say how proud you are of them.
You just have to look past the “I’m too cool to hear this” attitude.
I also find it fun to come up with creative ways to compliment my teens by engaging in their world.
Last week I started a daily “Feeling thankful for…” on my Facebook page. Each day I would put as my status something I was thankful for. I really want to keep the grateful train rolling in my heart.
Texting and Facebook have become great ways to connect to my teens. But instead of just giving out a general “Feeling thankful for my children” status, I sent one on separate days for each of my children. I gave recognition and appreciation for them on a very personal level.
I know…Facebook may not seem like a “personal” way to relate to your teen. But it’s better than nothing. When I was a teenager, the door to my bedroom remained shut, serving as a barrier between my parents and me.
However, Facebook actually helps to break down that barrier. I get invited into a whole new part of my teen’s world. I get to hear their thoughts (through their statuses), look at their pictures and see what their friends have to say.
And at least when I pay them a compliment or show my thankfulness for them on Facebook, I won’t have to see their eyes rolling.
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Photo by jasonhe in Flickr