The other day I wrote about how single parent families do not have to fall into the myth of constant chaos. It dawned on me that wanting to find more peace and tranquility in our family situations and actually being able to make it happen are two different things! But, I do believe that the first step is to actually get a clear mental picture or image of what you would like your single parent family to be like…
We can get so caught up in the stress and tensions of reality that we cannot see beyond that. As single parents, our plates are not just full they are overflowing. But, if we are to move beyond insecurity and chaos, the first step is to imagine what we would like our lives to look like—how we would like our family to be configured, what sort of parent we would like to be, etc. This may seem pretty obvious, but for someone who never imagined themselves to even BE a single parent, it can be a pretty important first step. We have to let go of whatever we may have intended or wanted to have happen in the past, or let go of the “old version” of ourselves and our families, in order to make room for a new one to take root and develop.
When you quiet yourself and imagine what you would like your family to be like, what do you see? How do you see yourself as head of this single family? Try not to focus on things like immediately finding a new partner or getting someone else to do something you want them to (pay back child support, for example) and focus on visualize the things you can affect and the realm that you do have control over. Once you get a healthy, inspirational idea of what your “goals” are for your family, you can start to feed those visualizations with affirmations and encouragement. You don’t have to reinvent the wheel to get your family on track—you can simply visualize yourself to a healthier, more peaceful, stable single parent family!
Also: Single Parent Families Don’t Have to Be Chaotic
The Myth of a Normal Life–Finding Peace
Try Not to Be In Such a Hurry To Move Through