If you want to protect your marriage from outside affairs, it might be helpful to understand what men and women look for when it comes to an affair. Usually (although not always!) there is something lacking in a relationship that prompts an affair.
Affairs can be complicated things, so I don’t want to suggest that things are black and white or that any of these reasons justify having an affair. But numerous studies have suggested that men and women generally are looking for different things, depending on gender, when they are ready to become involved in an affair.
I don’t claim to be an expert on this topic, so I thought I would read up a bit on it and see what others have to say. Take a look at this post below and tell me what your thoughts are on the subject.
Many people may claim that they when they begin an affair, they are looking for the actual physical sensation of the sexual act itself, if they feel that they are not getting it at home or getting it to their satisfaction. Why this may be true to a certain extent, most experts say that this is one of the lesser reasons for having an affair. Men tend to claim this more as a motivation for an affair than do women.
An article published by Focus on the Family, a Christian-oriented publisher, claims that men can seek affairs because they want to be respected. I don’t know if it is true, but I do know that respect can equal power in our society, and both can contribute to better self esteem.
The article goes on to claim that women seek an affair because they want to be loved. Being loved and wanted by another human being is a basic need that we all share from the time that we are born. When we feel loved and wanted then our self-esteem is given a boost.
If respect and love are lacking in a marriage, it makes sense that a spouse might seek it elsewhere. Certainly marriage surveys have implied that women tend to have more emotional affairs that then culminate in physical affairs, while men tend to have more physical affairs that may then grow to include and emotional attachment.
What do you think?
Mary Ann Romans writes about everything related to saving money in the Frugal Blog, creating a home in the Home Blog, caring for little ones in the Baby Blog and now relationships in the Marriage Blog. You can read more of her articles by clicking here.
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