There’s nothing more frustrating when you’ve chosen to breastfeed than a baby who cannot or will not latch. There are many reasons why a baby can’t latch, some can be corrected and some cannot. Or at least, in my experience they cannot.
When my daughter was born, we’d already decided to breastfeed. Our reasoning was as follows:
- Breastfeeding would be healthier for her.
- Breastfeeding would be cheaper for us.
- Breastfeeding would promote the bond between my daughter and I.
- Breastfeeding meant I wouldn’t have to warm up bottles.
Yes, I know – two of those reasons were pretty selfish, but then with so much time devoted to my baby, the primary reason remained that by breastfeeding, she would be healthier. So even if the other reasons didn’t apply, I would have wanted to do it. That the other reasons did apply, well they were just icing on the cake.
I think I mentioned before that I did not have one of those ‘glowing’ pregnancies. Everything didn’t just come together. In fact, pregnancy was a very uncomfortable and downright painful experience at times. I was equal parts relieved and delighted when my daughter was born. Shortly after her birth, she was cuddled in my arms and the nurse was helping me to set her up for her first nursing.
An hour later, I was frustrated enough to scream and so was the midget. She was distinctly unhappy and hungry. She couldn’t latch and I was starting to feel like a moron that I couldn’t get her to do it. I remember reading that it took some practice, so I took some solace in that. Every hour for the next several hours, I tried – except when she was asleep. When the nurse tried to wake her up to get her to try again, I told her to leave her alone.
By the next day, my milk was there, but the baby still wasn’t getting much. We tried a lot of different techniques, including expressing some directly into her mouth. The expressing worked to a point; she was getting some milk, but still not enough.
When the pediatrician arrived, I jumped on her – well metaphorically. I was worried and upset. My daughter was obviously hungry, but nothing was working – how bad would it be to give her a bottle if she couldn’t latch properly. The pediatrician felt that a bottle substitute would be all right, but I should try to nurse before and after, encouraging her to suckle so that she could nurse properly.
We got a bottle for her; she drained it quickly, belched like a pro and slept like a rock for two hours. The worry that she was fed was taken care of – but now the other worry – the quieter worry reared its ugly head – what was wrong with me? Why couldn’t I get her to latch? Was I some kind of reject? These are not the best thoughts to be having in the 24 hours since my baby’s birth – but what could I do?