Do you say “No” because that seems like the appropriate parental response? Limit-setting, saying “No” and trying to stop our children from doing ill-advised things is a big part of the parent’s job. Still, I think it helps sometimes to ask myself if I am saying “no” because that really is what is warranted, or am I doing it out of habit? Occasionally, I ask myself what really is the worst thing that could happen and I find that maybe the battle is not worth fighting.
For example, if you child goes outside in a summer rainstorm, will she really catch pneumonia and end up in the hospital? Maybe the very worst thing that can happen is that she will get wet. This might mean wet shoes, wet clothes and wet hair, but it probably will not result in a trip to the emergency room.
Keeping things in perspective is not always the easiest thing for the average parent. After all, we KNOW we have the life and safety of our child in our hands and since infancy, we’ve been stressed and determined to make sure they make it to adulthood all in one piece (at least that is the speech I give my children.) Keeping them safe, heading off discomfort and unnecessary mess, and trying to keep the neighbors from calling the cops or the newspaper are all motivators for saying “no” and trying to stop behaviors that do not seem “right.” Once in a while, however, there really is not any harm or lasting damage that can come from what our child may be doing or attempting to do—when you ask yourself what is the worst thing that could possibly happen, you may find that it really is not anything all THAT bad and maybe a “yes” is in order (or at least turning your head the other way.)