Any parent of a child more than a week old knows that kids can be challenging. When we turn to our friends and talk about life as a parent, we have a tendency to talk about the horrors and the challenges since we really want some help and support. Add to that the fact that as our kids get older, it becomes less and less acceptable to “brag” about what amazing and fabulous kids they are—especially since they can also be crabby and flawed human beings. I thought it might be fun to take a moment this evening to think about those incredible, fabulous and amazing quirks and personality traits that make each and every one of our children so incredibly special!
We get socialized into thinking that a child has to be a star athlete or academically gifted on some sort of traditional I.Q. scale or test in order for him or her to be amazing. While we parents might think every little thing a tiny new baby does is phenomenal, as they get older, we get inundated with growth charts, comparison percentiles, grades, and teacher conferences and pretty soon we’re having a hard time focusing in on those fabulously unique, lovable, delightful realities that make up our gift of a child.
I’ll go first in reminding myself some of the amazing things about my kids: I have one who has a great capacity to tolerate ambiguity and waiting, instead of feeling like she has to make quick decisions and choices; I have another who isn’t afraid to speak up to anyone about anything at any time—she is bold and strong and will fight the battles for those who are weaker—while at the same time being soft and emotional herself; I have another who is always trying to figure out why the world works the way it does—critiquing, investigating, forming opinions. He can never just let things be the way they are without trying to understand and evaluate. All of these fantastic personality traits are gifts, but they can also be problematic. Often the world urges us to see what is “wrong” with the way our children operate in it, instead of encouraging us to see how great those traits can be to.
So, why not take a little time to focus on your child and think of all the incredible, unique gifts that he or she has and the ways that your life has been expanded because of them?!
Also: Why High Energy Isn’t All Bad
We Don’t Get to Choose Their Personalities