What should you be teaching your children about marriage? What is the best way to go about teaching them are two questions to look at.
Here are some things I believe we should be teaching our children about marriage.
Marriage is not something that should be entered into lightly.
Marriage between a man and a woman is a lifetime commitment not just until you get tires of the person or bored or it becomes too hard.
Marriage is not for the faint hearted. It needs time, effort selflessness and work to make a great marriage.
Don’t go into it thinking you will change him or her after marriage.
Marriage is about caring for someone else rather than you and seeking to please them.
Living together before marriage is no guarantee that your marriage will succeed. Evidence suggests that often it has the opposite effect and can lead to more divorce.
If you are a Christian it’s important to warn your children of the problems and dangers inherent in marrying an unbeliever or someone from another faith. I’m not talking about different denominations here but radical fait differences e.g., Christian and Muslim or the like. It is important to have common beliefs and core values in a marriage.
Give them an idea of things to discuss before they get married e.g., beliefs, attitudes towards marriage, finances, in laws and family relationships, household jobs, children how many and will the wife work afterwards etc, is disciplinary issues and upbringing of children, etc.
Children learn in several ways. They learn by what people tell them. They learn by what they observe both at home and in society. Society include the images they see on TV and movies, the loves of pop and movie start, magazines and possibly even the home life of friends, present a distorted view of marriage.
It is imperative they have a positive home example because there is a lot that needs to be done to combat that view presented by society. Children learn by what they experience. Children learn best by example. In the home they need to see what a strong, loving supportive marriage looks like. They need to see a marriage where both partners show respect, love and concern for each other’s needs. They need to see a marriage where service, faithfulness, commitment and loyalty are modeled.
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