If you’re anything like me, sometimes you don’t say what you mean, or the words tangle and don’t come out the way they should.
It’s good when there’s someone who knows what you mean anyway. It’s like the quote by Ann D Parrish on my calendar that says ‘A friend understands what you are trying to say… even when your thoughts aren’t fitting into words. ‘
It’s even better when that person who understands like this is your marriage partner.
The other night Mick and I were sitting each doing crosswords and he came across a clue and filled in the answer. ‘I don’t know how I knew that,’ he said.
‘It’s amazing what a useless collection of trivia you know that you don’t know you know,’ I replied.
Mick laughed but then said,‘But I know what you mean.’
It’s nice to have someone who knows what I mean regardless of how it is said. Okay, so it may not have been perfect grammar, but he knew exactly what I meant. We had a good laugh and an interesting conversation about the things our minds store.
That’s a good aspect of marriage, when your spouse knows what you mean, regardless of what you say or how you say it. But it doesn’t always happen and we shouldn’t assume or expect it always will.
There will be times when you will say something and your spouse will look at you blankly or vice versa. Other times it will seem like you are talking at cross purposes. A lot of that can happen because men and woman think differently and process information, events and emotions differently
When that happens we just need to be as clear as we can be in what we say and in how we say it. It is too easy for a remark tossed off to be misinterpreted and cause problems. So if it looks like that is the case, don’t let misunderstanding fester but go back and make it clear what you mean. Have a good laugh about the misunderstanding and then move on from it.
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