“Woman’s Day” recently published an article about the nine things you should never say to your husband. First on the list was lying about your experience during sexual intimacy. That is a big no-no.
The second is to tell them that they are just like their father. The third is asking when they are going to find a new job. The fourth is bringing up how your mother had warned you about something your husband would do. The fifth is telling your husband that you will do it yourself, when it comes to a task or chore…in other words, acting as if he is a complete idiot and can’t possibly accomplish it.
The sixth is those fill-in-the-blank statements, “You always” and “You never.” The seventh is asking if your husband really thinks what he is wearing is flattering. The eighth is complaining about hanging out with one of his friends.
The final thing you should never say is to watch the kids but then follow it up with a list of things he shouldn’t forget and things he should do. It kind of goes back to the whole treating him like he’s stupid thing.
Now in the past almost 20 years of marriage, I have to confess…I have said eight of the nine things. And the only reason I didn’t hit nine is because my husband’s father passed away before I met him.
Ouch…when you read these things you think, “Wow, who says that?” But then if you are honest with yourself and if you have been married long enough, you realize that you probably have at least one time.
I was curious what my husband would say and so I asked him what is something a wife should never say to her husband. His response was, “You’re a loser.” I asked him if I have ever said that and he replied “No” but that for a period of time in our marriage I at least made him feel that way.
Ouch again. But yes, it’s true. I remember a period in our marriage when I didn’t think he was doing anything right. What I had done was lost sight of the man I had married. Suddenly I wanted him to become something different. I wanted him to read my mind, do things the way I did them and know how to properly respond to me.
What a heavy burden to place on your spouse. I have learned so much but there is still work to be done. In marriage there will always be work that needs to be done. But hopefully this will get you thinking about the things you say to your spouse.
So what is something else you think should never be said to your spouse?
Related Article:
Do You Speak Your Husband’s Love Language?
Showing Appreciation to Your Spouse
Are You Selfish or Selfless in Your Marriage?
Photo by taliesin in morgueFile