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What’s a Good Spouse?

I love to see those magazines headlines that offer you a quiz to determine whether or not your spouse is “good” or not. The problem with a lot of those questions is that an individual’s perceptions of likes and dislikes are different. What appeals to one person will not necessarily appeal to another. So your definition of a good spouse may not be mine and vice versa.

However, there are plenty of qualities that we can quantify as being desirable in a spouse. These qualities, characteristics or traits do vary from person to person. So, let’s see if my definition of a good spouse appeals to you.

A good spouse is one who:

  • remembers to put me first. He doesn’t have to give up everything in his life for me. But I appreciate a phone call that checks in before he heads off to go to rock climbing with the guys and the consultations on what I have on my platter before he agrees to a commitment elsewhere. I like to return that favor in kind
  • picks up after himself. Nothing drives me crazier than someone who doesn’t care enough about himself or his home, that he doesn’t give it a second thought to leave trash behind him. My husband and I both subscribe to the leave it better than you found it theory
  • does their best to be romantic every day. Romantic doesn’t have to mean flowers and candy – it is as simple as reaching out to hold hands when driving the car or pressing a kiss to the nape of the neck.
  • shares the burdens. A good spouse recognizes that you are in this together, whether it’s doing the laundry, taking care of the lawn or doing the dishes after dinner. When you share the burdens, you halve them.
  • keeps their marriage private. That privacy means that your marriage is between you and your spouse. That doesn’t mean you can’t have friends, but when your confidences are more in other people than they are in your spouse – you’re not being a good spouse.

So – how do you define a good spouse?

This entry was posted in Relationship Dynamics and tagged , , , by Heather Long. Bookmark the permalink.

About Heather Long

Heather Long is 35 years old and currently lives in Wylie, Texas. She has been a freelance writer for six years. Her husband and she met while working together at America Online over ten years ago. They have a beautiful daughter who just turned five years old. She is learning to read and preparing for kindergarten in the fall. An author of more than 300 articles and 500+ web copy pieces, Heather has also written three books as a ghostwriter. Empty Canoe Publishing accepted a novel of her own. A former horse breeder, Heather used to get most of her exercise outside. In late 2004, early 2005 Heather started studying fitness full time in order to get herself back into shape. Heather worked with a personal trainer for six months and works out regularly. She enjoys shaking up her routine and checking out new exercises. Her current favorites are the treadmill (she walks up to 90 minutes daily) and doing yoga for stretching. She also performs strength training two to three times a week. Her goals include performing in a marathon such as the Walk for Breast Cancer Awareness or Team in Training for Lymphoma research. She enjoys sharing her knowledge and experience through the fitness and marriage blogs.