Playdates can be a fun activity for both babies and their parents. Introducing your child to his peers is a great way to jump start the socialization process. Plus, having other adults to talk to during the day can help keep parents connected.
But one issue that eventually seems to come up for every parent who play dates is what to do if another child hits, bites or otherwise abuses your child. How do you balance the protective instinct with the aversion to discipline another parent’s child?
So what do you do if your little guys friend starts hitting?
The first thing to do is to do nothing. Give the other parent a chance to discipline her child. While you may want to intercede immediately, perhaps the other parent is taking a few seconds to consider her approach. Also understand that young babies sometimes bite and pinch as a way of exploring their world. Older toddlers and preschoolers, however, don’t have such an excuse.
If the moment passes and the parent does nothing, the next step is to decide if the other parent simply didn’t see the transgression. You might say something honest and direct such as “I think Jack just hit Amanda.” You can also pick up your child to offer comfort and remove her from the situation. Usually this will send the other parent flying to correct the issue.
But what do you do if your child’s little friend is constantly hitting while his parent ignores the behavior? When it comes to physical harm, you have every right to tell the child to stop. Speak with a firm but calm voice and say something such as, “We do not hit. Stop hitting right now.”
Usually this is enough to get the point across to both the child and the parent.
Sometimes, the other parent may object to your intervention. Simply explain that you are concerned about the children’s safety. If you get an eye roll or a comment about how the hitting wasn’t very hard in response, explain that you want to make sure that your child understands that hitting is wrong.
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