Do opposites attract? Or do two people who think alike have it made? Good marriages can be made up of two people that are opposite and balance each other, or two people who are so similar that they hardly ever disagree. Both types of marriages have their good and the not so good. Which marriage is yours?
Opposites Attract
You crave adventure, while your husband is content being home in the same routine. You like to save, and he likes to spend. You are shy and have only a few very close friends, and he is an outgoing party animal. He is the nerd and you are the athlete. There are so many ways to be opposite in a marriage.
The good
With opposites, you have a tendency to balance each other out. Where one person has a shortfall, the other person can step in to create a harmonious balance.
The not so good
With opposite personalities, there can be a lot of tension. The two of you may want different things or have different approaches to solving a problem. One partner may form a resentment of the other, if life favors one type of personality over the other.
The advice
With opposites, it is important to make sure that you keep that communication open and understand what the other person wants and needs. Having unconditional acceptance for your spouse, even if his views and opinions are not the same as yours can help. After all, you fell in love with the person as he is, didn’t you?
Make sure that you have the same core values in similarity, or at least discuss where you will fall as a marriage. Even if you don’t agree as individuals, you should come to the same basic philosophy on important areas such as money, children and fidelity. Work out solutions that will make both of you comfortable in your opposite views. You might set up a disposable spending account, for example, so that the spender can spend all he likes up to a limited amount without retribution.
Check back again for a look at marriages made up of similar partners.
Mary Ann Romans writes about everything related to saving money in the Frugal Blog, creating a home in the Home Blog, caring for little ones in the Baby Blog and now relationships in the Marriage Blog. You can read more of her articles by clicking here.
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