Years ago, when my children were still preschool age, my daughters went to a preschool that in many ways was absolutely wonderful. BUT, I had a hard time blending very well with the other parents—mostly because they seemed to be an usually competitive group. Now I’m not talking about parents screaming on the sidelines at a soccer game, I’m talking about bragging, boasting, and comparing every single milestone and developmental step. To hear these parents talk, you’d think that no child had ever done anything before theirs!
Of course, there are always some parents who feel very competitive about things and I’m not saying this is a terrible thing—it just didn’t fit my temperament. I tend to be a smidge competitive when it comes to sports—but not really very competitive at all when it comes to other things. I’ve certainly never felt like my children needed to be first, biggest, or best. I figured they would just develop at their own pace and do well at some things and not so well at others. And, while I do think that accomplishments and “successes” should be celebrated, I also tend to be somewhat understated and reserved about such things. In my value system, there is plenty of room for humbleness.
I don’t necessarily subscribe to the opinion that competitive parents make for competitive kids. In fact, sometimes I think children go the other way as some sort of cosmic balance. In this preschool, the classroom was actually quite relaxed and my girls fit right in. Whether this was because of the teachers or just luck, or because of the temperament of the children, I don’t know. This was what caused me to continue being involved, even though I didn’t really feel camaraderie with the parents. However, I’ve tended to avoid other situations where it seemed like the parents were just too competitive for my taste. I imagine there are competitive parents who prefer to be with others of their own kind too (instead of all of us laid back slackers).
I’m open to hearing of other opinions and experiences about competitive parents—where do you fall on the competition fence?
See Also: Home Schooling and Competion–Or the Lack of It and Keeping Up With the Jones