Yesterday, I discussed a few ways to handle play dates that become nightmares. Here are some more tips to help you survive.
Take a break: If your group is meeting weekly in the same setting it is possible the children are reacting out of boredom. The novelty of the new setting may be wearing off and now they are ready to push boundaries. Perhaps taking a week off will do everyone some good. It will also send a message to your child that acting poorly will result in not playing with his friends. If your child is not the one causing issues but the recipient you may also feel a week off would be fitting. There is no need to tell your child why you are taking a week off. Simply tell your child you will go again the next week. You want to avoid speaking poorly about anyone to or in front of your child. It will come back to haunt you and it is in poor form.
The Right Group: You may have wanted to be part of a play group but that does not mean your play group is a good fit for you. The clash could simply be an inherent problem in the group. Perhaps the children are not being disciplined properly and the moms will not take incidents seriously. Maybe your child is simply not getting along due to being too old, too young, the only girl or the only boy. Many times these differences are immaterial but there are times it will be significant.
Assign a Caregiver: Many times chaos ensues because there is no one person or persons to care for the children. Many successful groups assign one mom to give a lesson or do a craft for whole time or part of the time. The activity keeps the children busy and happy. You can rotate who cares for the children or assign that task to older siblings. If that is impossible then make your play dates more interactive by going to the apple orchard, a park, a pumpkin patch, or a place fun for both the kids and adults. A group of children in one room, even with toys, is asking for something to happen.
Rules of Engagement: It is important to establish rules from the start. Have a meeting with all the moms and agree on a set of rules and how to handle incidents. If everyone is on the same page it may alleviate hurt feelings or long term issues from happening. It will also give moms a guideline explaining to their children what type of behavior is expected from them during the play date.
When Play Dates Go Wrong, Part 1
Should I get my preschooler a pet?