I’ve been lucky because up until about 4 or 5 months ago, my 4 year old was still napping everyday. She has definitely outgrown the naps. Occasionally when she is really tired she will lay down and take one, but that time is rare. Since I also have a toddler that still naps, we are in the house during nap time still. I have explained to my daughter that nap time is now quiet time for both her and Mommy.
The rules of our new “quiet time” are that she has to stay in her room, and play quietly or look at books. Luckily, she loves books, and this worked quite well for some time. She would play with her TAG book system, or color. Sometimes she would do puzzles. I always try to talk to her about what she is going to do while we have quiet time so that she is prepared to stay in her room and have a quiet activity by herself.
But, she is her mother’s daughter. I have never been the kind of person that wants a lot of alone time. I like to surround myself with other people. If I had my way, I’d have a girlfriend over everyday to chat and hang out. But, life usually gets in the way of that. So, I have to limit myself to a weekly get together with my own friends. Now, she will only last about 45 minutes in her room, but my son is still napping for another hour or so after that.
What do you do when quiet time stops working?
* Try finding an activity that your child can do alone, but near you. Puzzles, coloring, or a craft that requires little supervision is always a good idea. Just being close to you, but not necessarily interacting with you can give you and your pre-schooler that much needed down time.
* If you can’t beat them, join them right? Well, sometimes, I have realized that just a few extra minutes of my attention before quiet time will help my daughter be more satisfied with her alone time. Try reading a few stories, or playing a game with your child before quiet time. This extra attention from Mommy without other siblings around will help your child feel safe and secure in her quiet alone time.
* Plan your day so that quiet time is the time when your child gets the special privilege of watching a movie. I try to limit the amount of TV that my children watch each day, so if you are in need of some down time yourself, make sure you limit TV before quiet time, so that you can allow it during quiet time if necessary.
* Ask your child what he/she wants to do. Sometimes kids just want to choose for themselves what their next activity is. It can be so tempting to tell our children, “OK, now you are going to look at books” or whatever. If we give them the ability to choose their quiet-time activity, they might just be content a little longer doing it.
Sometimes, our children just need us. As parents, many times we will have to reserve our own “quiet time” for the evening. Quiet time should leave some room for flexibility. That housework, or real work can always wait until later. Sometimes our children just can’t.
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