Parenting choices are not written in stone—even if we do know that we need to be consistent and set firm boundaries, there are still those times when we change our minds. Experience teaches us a thing or two or we discover that what worked with one child does not necessarily work with another so we need to adjust. There is no shame and should not be any guilt, but it can be tough figuring out just how to go about changing our mind without losing face…
If truth be told, in my two decades of parenting, I have changed my mind plenty of times and about some pretty big stuff too! What I thought I would do when my kids were little (or even before they were born) did not always pan out in the midst of the real world. I know firsthand how a parent can struggle with exactly how to go about changing one’s mind without appearing to be inconsistent, giving in, or having lax limits about things. After all, we do not want to send a message to our kids that we will change our minds on a whim.
I have learned that not only can I save face by being direct with my kids, but it can actually bolster one’s authority and respect if handled correctly. If my kids know that I have given my change of heart and mind a lot of thought, taken everything into consideration and why I have changed my mind, they tend to respond very favorably and not try to take advantage of the change. We parents are not robots and we are learning as we go along too. By maintaining responsibility, we can teach our children how to evolve and learn from life’s lessons, while still staying in charge.
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