Are you constantly trying to come up with fun family activities? Scanning the newspaper and web sites to find suitable and age-appropriate things for you and your kids to do? Have you ever thought of letting the kids find and choose the activities and being willing to go along with THEIR interests?
As my children have gotten older, I have been learning how to let go a little on my activities director role. I may not always get to do something that I love, but spending time with my kids (whom I do love) is well worth it. I credit my letting up on being in control of the “what” we do to my being able to maintain a connection with each of my children through the bumpy teenage years. Letting them choose the movie, the restaurant, or the television show for a change instead of expecting them to come on board with our activities can be an important part of long-term bonding.
Even tiny children need to be able to direct the play and decide what is done instead of having mom or dad be “in charge” of everything. Think of how much self-esteem, confidence, and mutual enjoyment comes from our allowing our little ones to direct the play and activities. As they get older, letting them have a say about vacations, the menu for family dinners, and what to do on a weekend can be a great way to strengthen family bonds, and give them a chance to express their interests and personalities in a safe and supportive environment. Besides, it can be fun and interesting going along with whatever they come up with—I would have never watched a single episode of “Survivor” or “American Idol” if it hadn’t been for my teenagers getting to choose the television program.
Also: Telling Them What to Do with Their Leisure Time
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