Does your family “do” Santa? Why or why not?
My love affair with Santa has waxed and waned over the years. As a teenager, I was so keen on Christmas celebrations that I would bake cookies for weeks, playing Santa for friends and relatives. As a university student, I was actually hired to be an elf for two Christmases. As delighted children came up to see Santa, I would prep them (and him) for the interaction by talking with them about their Christmas wishes.
At the time, I loved the excitement that the children had about Santa Claus. It was a magical moment. I was less than comfortable with the whole consumer aspect of Santa Claus – the idea that we’re training our kids to associate Christmas with a man with a white beard who will bring you stuff. Then again, this thought was tempered by the idea that Christmas is about the spirit of giving. Santa Claus is a kind and gentle man, so unlike many of the male television heroes that our children see. I hoped that children would connect the dots and understand that masculinity is not just the slap-bang movies that are portrayed on television, it’s also the gentleness of giving and loving.
Until I became a parent, I was fairly comfortable with the mythology of Santa Claus. However, I didn’t realize that there were some who were deeply uncomfortable, and not for religious reasons. They were not comfortable with telling their children something was real when it was not.
I can understand this. When it comes to my preschooler, I’ve actually said very little about Santa. What I’ve realized, though, is that the mythology is quite pervasive. My child is exposed to Santa through the children at her preschool or even she walks through the mall. This year, as her interest grows, I’ve let her take the lead. My illusions were shattered fairly early. At age six, I helped Santa by filling the stockings for my younger siblings. I’m not too worried about creating or destroying any of her illusions. When she asks if Santa is real, we talk about the spirit of giving, and I let her debate about the reality of the many mall Santas that we see. She’s gotten in on the game this year, and we’re tricking Daddy by giving him a Santa gift.
So while I love the spirit of giving and the spirit of a kind and gentle man, I’m iffy about perpetuating the mythology. I’m not going to confirm, and I’m not going to deny. I think that I’ll just sit happily on the fence and see what happens. Anyone with me? Anyone not do Santa in a big way?