I would LIKE to think that it is always my kids who need to make adjustments to their attitudes. After all, they are the snarky, snappy, obnoxious teenagers some of the time. And I am the mellow, wise, calm, and brilliant mother—at least that’s how I like to think of the movie that is running in my head. In reality, sometimes it is ME who needs to make a tweak or two to my attitude.
As a matter of fact, if all of those spiritual and self-help books are right (and I am not quite ready to say that they all are)—I can ONLY control my own attitude and I do not really have any say about any one else’s. Now, that is not exactly what the average parent wants to hear. We would sure like to think that we’ve got it going on and it is our children who need to shape up!
When things are really bumpy in my household, I find that it is really ALL of us who need an attitude adjustment. We feed off of each other and bad energy can spread like wildfire. One grumpy person sneezes on another and soon we have an epidemic of crabby (or rude, or obnoxious, or whatever the contagious attitude-disease-du-jour might be). But, when I am in clear mind, I can admit that it is me who needs to adjust her attitude just as often as it is anyone else.
BUT, my mind isn’t always clear. I am just a flawed, human creature after all, and I do sometimes forget that my kids and I are really in this life thing together. It is not always they who need to make adjustments to their outlook (although it IS sometimes) and, I have far more control over myself than I do over anything they do.
See Also: Unconventional Kids and Unconventional Parents and Harmony Takes Time