This week, my oldest was part of her elementary school’s annual dance festival. Each grade was given lots of lessons from dance instructors funded by a special state grant. The children did dances from several places around the world. Our girl was learning a dance from Africa, and a song called “The Traveling Song.” We’d catch her practicing the dance steps, but she would not tell us too much about it, wanting to show all the moves off at the festival.
A few days before the event, we received a notice that the children should be wearing white pants. Each class had a different costume to prepare, and ours were the pants with a certain colored shirt, depending on what row the kids were in. We tried to bleach a pair of jeans. No dice. Cool-looking, now, but not white. We bought a pair, which is to say of course my wife bought a pair.
At the festival, one of the moms we are close to mentioned to me that her son is wearing girls’ pants.
The day before the festival, she picked him up after school, and he asked her, “did you get my white pants?” After a few curse words in her native tongue (though he knows most of them anyway), they dashed over to the local department store. No white pants for boys. Panic. Her younger son is in nursery school only for another half hour.
She distracted the anxious dancer for a second and grabbed a pair of girls’ pants off the shelf.
“where did you get this?” He was suspicious. He hung in tough with her non-answer answers. He knew. “THOSE ARE GIRLY PANTS!”
But they’re not so bad, she said, no one will know, and after, we’ll donate them to charity – see? It’s a good thing!
“You’re right, because I’m NEVER wearing those pants again!”
I tell this story partly to amuse, but also because I was reflecting on the assumptions made by whoever decided on the outfits. Probably never had to buy for boys! How easy is it to find white pants for 5 and 6 year-old girls? A lot easier than finding them for boys. It’s the subtle inferences and assumptions that are the most fascinating to explore. The decision-makers only thought at one specific level, and it did not work entirely in reality. It’s not a major thing, here, of course, but I found the whole episode more than merely amusing.