If you have read my previous posts about building a hedge around your marriage, then forgive me. I think it is just such an important subject in this day and age that more needs to be said. Our marriages can be made vulnerable by outside influences.
Building a hedge around your marriage means that although you can look over and see what is going on in the world, you still maintain an active form of protection that keeps those negative influences and temptations away. The hedge encompasses yourself and your spouse.
Think of this hedge as an investment that will allow your marriage to flourish. It will need to be maintained, but like most good hedges, will mostly take care of itself once it is planted.
A hedge keeps things in, and it keeps things out. It is a boundary put into place. In marriage, this boundary can be seen as a set of rules that both spouses agree upon. For example, most couples will agree that infidelity is an important boundary that shouldn’t be crossed.
Another thing about a hedge is that it can restrict access. Within the hedge of your marriage, you can feel protected and safe. On the other hand, knowing where the boundaries are can be very freeing. There will be no need to wrestle with temptation when you can never wander very far into it.
To start building your hedge, begin with the obvious boundaries and then move on to other areas. For example: porn, spending time with someone of the opposite sex, sharing secrets with someone else, lying to each other, etc.
Here is just one example. I have personally chosen to remove keepsakes that had sentimental significance in old relationships. While there may be nothing wrong with going down memory lane once in a while, displaying and cherishing these items from the past takes the focus off of my marriage and my life now. I never want my wonderful husband to feel as though there is someone else in my heart or our home. My husband never asked me to do this, but it was something that I felt was important.
Do you have a hedge around your marriage?
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Building a Hedge Around Your Marriage
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