You will often hear me refer to Dr. Phil as I write some of these blogs on teenagers. He does a great job at tackling some of the issues that teens deal with today. One of the running themes that I see in virtually every show of his that deals with teenage issues is a sense of entitlement.
Many teens believe that they are entitled to things, not just material possessions but it can come in the way of freedom. They feel like they are so close to adulthood that they have the right to do things that adults do. You will often hear teens say that they are treated like babies. Yes, I have even heard that come out of the mouth of my own 16-year-old son.
One of the things that I try to teach my teens is that with freedoms come responsibility. I have no problem allowing my teens to experience more freedom as they get older, yet I also expect them to handle it in a responsible manner.
For instance, all of my children have cell phones. My husband and I pay those cell phone bills. We are their parents and although they have the freedom to use those phones, they must demonstrate responsibility. A recent issue came up where one of my children was not using their phone responsibly and so it had to be taken away.
Some teenagers are absolutely floored when their parents try to enforce rules. They just cannot believe that their parents would have the audacity to hold them accountable. I see this so often in many of Dr. Phil’s shows. It really grates at my nerves and makes me wonder where the parents went wrong.
Teens will naturally feel a sense of entitlement because they are just at a very selfish age. Yet as parents we need to make sure we aren’t feeding into that. We need to teach them that with freedoms comes responsibility. If they mess up, there will be a price to pay. It shouldn’t really come as a shock to them. They should know that we have expectations and if they are not met, then there will be repercussions.
This may be difficult for teens that have grown up rarely experiencing discipline. Being a balanced parent means knowing when to lay down the law and when to let things go. Don’t allow your teen to think they deserve whatever they want. Teach your teen that with their freedoms come responsibility.
Related Articles:
Walk a Bit in Your Children’s Shoes
Is Teen Rudeness Really a Trend?
How to Enter Your Teen’s World