Although I would LOVE to learn how to live a life void of fear, I have been working on ways to work through those habitual and seemingly in-grained initial fear responses. Whether it is a new work idea, something that comes up with my kids, or other typical life event, sometimes my first response is to feel nervous and fearful. As single parents, we can learn how to push past those initial fear responses that might be holding us back from making significant changes.
I was recently asked to submit a full propose for a substantial freelance job in a field that is virtually unfamiliar to me. My initial response was one of panic—how would I find time to squeeze the work into an already full schedule? Who did I think I was even trying for such a big account? What if I committed and then was unable to fulfill the obligation? Would my other work suffer if I was awarded the contract? I could probably go on and on with the fearful thoughts that flooded my brain in just the first five or ten minutes of my thinking about the situation. I know that I am not alone—many of us single parents might react to a promotion, potential relocation, or even buying a car with the same sorts of fear responses. We are so used to having to pull in and live life on a shoestring, not to mention we have been conditioned by life not to get our hopes up—that we feel the fear first of all.
The thing I am learning is that I do not have to stay in that fearful place or even give into those thoughts. The sooner I start breathing, bring myself back to the present moment and let go of all those “if” thoughts, the sooner I am able to get myself out of the fear. All I have to do is live one moment at a time. By staying in the here and now and trusting that I will be able to adjust and handle whatever might happen down the line, I am learning how to banish the fear response and react more openly to the adventures life sends my way.
Also: Help Your Child Triumph Over Irrational Fears
Is Fear Holding You Back? How to Work with Your Fears