Just in case you thought I’d forgotten or was chickening out of finishing the alphabetical marriage blog, here is the XYZ of marriage. Yes, I can almost see the scratching of heads wondering what the first one has to do with marriage. Let me explain.
X-ray
Most of us have either been for an X-ray or had a family member X-rayed. What happens is an X-ray shows the bones and if there are any breaks that need to be fixed. We each need to turn the X-ray on and be sure the bones of our marriage are strong. We need to look carefully to see if there are any breaks or hairline fractures that need to be fixed. We can’t work on problems in marriage, unless we know they exist, so it helps to sometimes just take stock of where we are. If we look at our marriage clearly, it should also show up the things that are knitted together and working well and doing their job properly in a marriage.
Xerox
We might also think about this one. Xerox is a trademark of a machine used for copying. As your children and neighbors look at your marriage, do they see a pattern of a happy, lasting marriage that is worth copying?
Yearning
The dictionary definition is ‘intense desire and longing for’ or to ‘feel tenderness and affection.’ What is your most intense desire? Is it for your spouse and making your marriage the best it can be? Is it climbing the corporate ladder or having the same possessions as the neighbors? Hopefully your yearning is for your spouse and not focused on your ex or someone from your past or someone else at work.
Yoked Together
In olden times animals were yoked together. That was the way it was most productive. That way they worked as a team instead of one wanting to go one direction and the other pulling against it. It’s still the most productive way for a marriage. Do you see yourself intrinsically and invisibly yoked to your spouse, working as a team and heading in the same direction? I hope so. It’s hard to maintain a marriage where we each want different things.
Zeal
Zeal is ‘fervent or enthusiastic devotion.’ Isn’t that what each of us should have, that kind of passionate devotion to each other and to our marriage?
Zing
Every marriage needs a little bit of zing – that spark or vitality that lifts it out of the ordinary. So plan fun times with your spouse, special evenings together or a little surprise, anything to keep the zing in marriage.
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